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Vicky

 
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JMW



Joined: 29 Nov 2004
Posts: 399
Location: Poland, Poznan

PostPosted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 12:24 pm    Post subject: Vicky Reply with quote

Vicky, when you see this, please contact me. I would like this text to be published here by yourself (under your forum name).
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I started when I was 25 years old, and not knowing anything. I was 10-15 lbs over my weight and when I heard about water fasting, I knew, this was the thing I wanted to do (weight loss) and was very excited. I fasted on water for 8 days and then almost passed out, I smoked cigarettes and drank chocolate milk at times during this 8 days. This was my first step into what was to become my life interest and for 27 years that is what it has been. The water fast first, then a change to healthier foods, then vitamins, then a "awareness" moment about eating animals etc. and then began to become a vegetarian (eliminating red meat etc.), then, to fish /eggs/dairy etc., then to eliminating fish, and, eggs was next to go and then dairy. I was 30 at this point when I became a vegan, and when I first read a book given to me by my now x-husband (survival into the 21st century), I looked at it and "KNEW INSTANTLY" I wanted to be a BREATHARIAN. I was not excited about sprouts and carrot juices and raw food, I decided that to be a breatharian I would have to first cleanse my body etc. and decided to be a fruitarian (use fruit to cleanse, I also gave up smoking cigarettes at this time,which lasted for 8 years). Fruitarian diet lasted for a month or so and from there it was raw/vegan/vegetarian and fruitarian days. I nursed 2 children, 2 years with one and 1 1/2 with my second, but trying to live on mostly fruit was not possible for me but I kept trying. Mostly it was a vegan diet for the next 8 years and getting more into fruitarian days, also during this period of 8 years I used wheat grass (implants, drinking etc.) and grew my own for awhile (cleansing), and also used internal cleansers (psyllim husks etc.) and (a.m./p.m.). with the mostly raw food diet and fruitarian days and internal cleansers and wheat grass cleansing/rebuilding was what I was doing for these intensive 8 years. I want to add that during this time I began to look worse and experienced a lot of physical weakness and emotional and mental effects like: (irritability, memory loss, emotional outbursts, spacy etc.) more and more as time went on. I did not look at this as >something was wrong< but,instead I kept telling myself what others kept telling me and that was "IT WAS A CLEANSING EFFECT". My teeth were separating also and brown spots on my face began appearing too during this time. I was very determined and believed in this so much. In 1988 my youngest son who I was still nursing, began throwing up, and I had to make a decision to stop nursing because I was told that the reason was I was cleansing my lympathetic glands etc., this experience led to my son loosing a lot of weight. Not wanting to use animal products or take him to a hospital (medicines, drugs etc.), he lost more and more weight and when I saw him breathing like he was going to die soon. MY MOTHER, and LOVE FOR MY SON INSTINCT, OVERRIDED ANY BELIEFS! AT THAT MOMENT. I MADE A PHONE CALL TO FRIEND WHO WAS ALSO INVOLVED IN THESE BELIEFS AND WHO GREW AND SOLD WHEAT GRASS AND WHEN I TOLD HER WHAT WAS HAPPENING TO MY SON. SHE ADVISED ME TO TAKE HIM TO THE HOSPITAL... AND... IT DID... IMMEDIATELY! This was when everything began to turn around.

The news media (TV, radio, newspapers) had us on the news for weeks (aggravated child abuse etc.), was also arrested (a few hours), and losing both my children to the state, and battling the courts for a year. When it became clear, they were not going to give our children back as they had promised, or anytime soon, WE KIDNAPPED OUR OWN CHILDREN! AND... flew to Mexico where we lived for 5 years. From the moment my son was taken to the hospital (198? to this day, everything took a turn in the opposite direction (fruitarian/or breatharian) although fruitarian and breatharian belief was mine alone, my x was not a believer in this but was a strong believer in raw foods / vegan / iridology / kundalini energy / psychic things / trance medium / pyramid meditation etc.

Now, my sons were being given meat, eggs, dairy etc. to eat, and my x and I began to start using different foods. Confusion, shock, and ... why? why?.. was in our minds. I COULD FEEL THE ENERGY of what was happening, and it could NOT BE CHANGED. (It was like this was going to happen in this way no matter what we did.

I went to a dentist during this time, he had a look of shock after looking at my teeth, and sent me directly to a PERIDONTIST (gum surgery) and then I went to a ORTHODONIST. I WAS VERY CLOSE TO LOOSING MY TEETH.

All these years I thought I was cleansing and doing what was right and healthy for me and my sons, turned out terrible. My son almost died and both of sons taken away for a year (although I was with them everyday and for any reason I could make to see and be with them while this was going on). I was weak and unbalanced and emotionally crazy and would still not give up. So,... life had turned from going towards fruitarian to (inch by inch) giving into eating fish etc. animal products. Our legal situation was taken care of and we came back to the states 5 years later. I had come to believe that all diets are not the way, that all foods are drugs and therefore there will be the part that feels good and then the effects (deterioration). I have been UNABLE to stop believing in breatharian. I have changed my diet from using cleansing fruits (sweet) to grapefruit once a day, using fresh lemon water, I drink coffee with milk or cream and smoke cigarettes. I started doing this in Mexico, the struggle and stress and the effects of food and everything. I have been unable to go beyond where I am no matter what I say or do or anything. If I take dairy out of my diet one of the first things I notice is my teeth starting to become sensitive and then I begin to struggle. I can not handle the effects of plants foods of any kind, I try to go on water and I throw away my coffee, my cigarettes, milk/cream, cheese, I CAN NOT! I have tried to give up believing in breatharian, but can not. When I look back at where I was (vegan / fruitarian) to where I am, I am going in the opposite direction and have been for many years now. I am still struggling with all of this, I react to all foods and drinks I put into my mouth except water, "it is not easy". I have tried to accept whatever it is I am supposed to but am not sure yet what that is. Maybe it is not possible to live without some food, including animal products (dairy or goat's milk or something animal protein). I know when I try I run back to dairy and occasionally meat.

I hope this has helped you and the readers here to understand the life process of one who believes strongly in breatharian/living without food, but my spirit / God / All That Is ... does not allow it to happen, AND ... HAS STOPPED IT FROM GOING IN THAT DIRECTION, AS YOU HAVE READ ABOVE IN MY STORY. I am open and want to understand what this is all about, I am not ready yet to see it clearly I guess but I want to, even if it means that man's experience in this world is to be a part of life and not isolated, and that is part of love. Maybe love is accepting that it is not about giving up food which causes ISOLATION. Unable to connect with people anymore is part of this life that is associated with this belief. Maybe what we or I need to see or understand is ... just eat and be a part of life, and have friends (and in my case date again) and be with people and just enjoy food and life because it is about loving others and being loved and that involves being involved and not being isolated and alone and struggling?

I do not want to be sick or look wrinkly or etc. but maybe?? If I continue to do some cleansing like I do, and smoke some cigarettes, drink some coffee, eat some meat etc. and just enjoy life or try to?
I do not know. Maybe breatharian, REALLY ... LIVING...WITHOUT FOOD ... OF ANY KIND ... JUST DRINKING SOME WATER ... is not possible.

I often wonder as I continue to try to understand what I am supposed to learn here, "I was so close years ago, living on vegan for 8 years, a lot of cleansing for years, and almost a fruitarian??", I ask why?? "I was so close" but something stopped it, (God/My Spirit) in a very powerful way.

Vicky
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ahbab



Joined: 30 Sep 2007
Posts: 13

PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 5:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey Vicky,
It seems to me you might be missing one ingredient for your breatharian recipe. Most of folks here, including me, are doing some sort of exercises, meditations, visualizations... and stuff like that. I didn't see you mentioned something like that. Maybe it can help you move further to becoming a breatharian. Also you might try "external" help like shiatsu treatments or visiting people having healing abilities. That helped me. JMW's book has also helped me a lot. It provided me with some hints and links I was missing.
I "resonate" with you, with that part when you feel "spark" inside telling you to go towards inedia. I wish for you to find your way, find your equilibrium. Because after reading your post I'm under impression you're torn within. Feeling you need to go one way, but for all those years something is always keeping you away from it. Hope you'll find your missing link.

Cheers,
Ahbab
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